WASHINGTON, DC, September 11, 2012 - Many children today have little to no memory of the September 11, 2001 attacks eleven years ago. But they know about it.
News organizations replay horrific images of the planes crashing into the
The scorched earth in the bucolic field in Pennsylvania. The gaping hole in the wall of the formidable Pentagon.
The events of September 11, 2001 are studied in school. All of which are traumatizing for children, and adults, to see.
About 700 children lost their parents during the September 11, 2001 attacks and among that group were dozens of children born after the attacks occurred.
Kids today are growing in a world where there are rigid pat downs at airports and uniformed armed guards on commuter trains are normal. Where rather than being just told to watch out for strangers they have to be warned to be on the lookout for suspicious looking people or abandoned bags.
A new normal includes awareness of terror group “Al Qaeda”. And for Arab and Muslim Americans who wear traditional religious garb, the new normal also includes being gawked at with suspicious stares when they are out and about.
And as each year passes; it appears that less people are reacting with the same passion. The date is creeping towards the memory vault with other tragic past events like the December 7,
An American flag is stuck into the etched name of Father Mychal F. Judge, the New York Fire Department chaplain who died in the 9/11 attacks on the World Trade Center, at the National September 11 Memorial in New York Monday, Sept. 12, 2011. The 9/11 memorial plaza opened to the public Monday for the first time. (AP Photo/Mike Segar, Pool)
But 9/11 doesn’t have to become a distant memory, just another page in the history book so soon.
Parents can pass on to their children an awareness of the day and how it is being used to celebrate the lives of the victims and the resilience of America.
“One of the big challenges of being a parent these days is figuring out how to discuss tragedies with their children because they are exposed to them via media on a repeated basis,” Rende said. “It’s something that you can’t control, typically, but it’s something you have to be prepared to discuss whenever it happens. The anniversary of 9/11 is somewhat unusual because you have some time to prepare.”
Consider these steps for the talk:
- Don’t wait for your kids to approach you; let them know the lines of conversation are open.
- Set aside a time to do this when you won’t be quickly interrupted.
- Answer simply and directly. Less is more. Be honest without being graphic.
- Listen to the kids and let their questions guide you. Don’t broach new subjects they haven’t asked about.
- Be reassuring. Give them the confidence that they’re okay.
- Monitor their exposure to media as best you can.
- Be prepared for the conversation to continue after the anniversary.
Everyday represents an opportunity to connect with children. Ask them how they are feeling and if there is anything they have seen or heard that gives them concern. Be ready and be open and honest.
It can be a solemn occasion to draw closer to them as well.
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