CHARLOTTE, September 5, 2012—The National Football League is back, so it is time for Narcotics For Leatherheads (NFL).
Every week, from a different sportsbar in America, the point spreads on every game will be offered along with predictions.
After the games are over, a link to the TYGRRRR EXPRESS will contain a recap of every single game. Those recaps will run about 10,000…yes, 10,000 words. Think of it as Peter King’s Monday Morning Quarterback except no mere mortal will ever reach his level.
The opening Wednesday night game will be watched from a sportsbar in Charlotte, North Carolina, while the Sunday games will be enjoyed in Asheville a couple of hours away.
So whatever team you root for, just thank almighty God that professional football has returned. There is nothing in this world like it. On the eighth day, God flipped a coin in the air, and then uttered those words.
“Gentlemen…let’s play football.”
This concludes “the other” Sunday bible study.
Welcome to Week 1 of the 2012 National Football League Season, courtesy of Narcotics For Leatherheads.
Wednesday night:
Dallas Cowboys @ New York Giants (4)
(Giants win but fail to cover)
Sunday:
Indianapolis Colts @ Chicago Bears (9.5)
(Bears cover)
Philadelphia Eagles (8) @ Cleveland Browns
(Eagles win but fail to cover)
Buffalo Bills @ New York Jets (3)
(Jets cover)
Washington Redskins @ New Orleans Saints (9.5)
(Saints cover)
New England Patriots (6.5) @ Tennessee Titans
(Patriots win but fail to cover)
Jacksonville Jaguars @ Minnesota Vikings (4.5)
(Vikings cover)
Miami Dolphins @ Houston Texans (10.5)
(Texans cover)
St. Louis Rams @ Detroit Lions (8.5)
(Lions cover)
Atlanta Falcons (2.5) @ Kansas City Chiefs
(Upset, Chiefs win outright)
San Francisco 49ers @ Green Bay Packers (5.5)
(Packers win but fail to cover)
Carolina Panthers (2.5) @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers
(Panthers cover)
Seattle Seahawks (2.5) @ Arizona Cardinals
(Upset, Cardinals win outright)
Pittsburgh Steelers @ Denver Broncos (1)
(Broncos cover)
Monday night:
Cincinnati Bengals @ Baltimore Ravens (6)
(Ravens cover)
San Diego Chargers (1) @ Oakland Raiders
(Upset, Raiders win outright)
Are you ready for some football!!!!!!!
Let’s get it on!!!!!!!!
Brooklyn born, Long Island raised, and now living in Los Angeles, Eric Golub is a columnist, blogger, author, public speaker, satirist and comedian who is obsessed with the National Football League. There is no offseason. Every February he pretends to care about other sports while sobbing uncontrollably each Sunday until September.
Eric is the author of the book trilogy “Ideological Bigotry, “Ideological Violence,” and “Ideological Idiocy.” When not watching football, his only other hobby is Republican, Jewish women. Republican, Jewish women, you may contact Eric above.
Follow Eric on Twitter @TYGRRRREXPRESS
Eric Golub is an independent writer for the Communities. Read more from Eric at his TYGRRRR EXPRESS blog.
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