SOUTH FLORIDA, October 27, 2012—Before getting to the NFL 2012 Week 8 Prequel, let me get deeply personal. Inspired by the absolutely brilliant youths Lena Dunham and Katy Perry, I want America to know about my first time.
It was amazing. I cried. It was the most spiritual experience of my life. When it was over I just wanted the other person to hold me. Instead, I settled for a handshake as they said those words that still get me emotional.
“Ok, Mr. Golub, your DirecTV is now installed. You have the NFL package and can now watch all of the football games. Here are the channels where you can watch the games in high definition. Now let me show you how to operate your remote control.”
That Sunday was more beautiful than I could have possibly imagined, and I will always cherish it.
Years later, it remains special. Now let’s enjoy some more special moments with giddy teeny-boppers talking in the background. Let’s get to football.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers @ Minnesota Vikings (6.5) was the Thursday night game.
(Vikings win but fail to cover)
Carolina Panthers @ Chicago Bears (7.5)
(Bears win but fail to cover)
San Diego Chargers (3) @ Cleveland Browns
(Chargers cover)
Atlanta Falcons @ Philadelphia Eagles (2.5)
(Eagles cover)
Seattle Seahawks @ Detroit Lions (2.5)
(Lions cover)
Jacksonville Jaguars @ Green Bay Packers (13)
(Packers cover)
Miami Dolphins @ New York Jets (2.5)
(Jets cover)
Washington Redskins @ Pittsburgh Steelers (5)
(Steelers win but fail to cover)
New England Patriots (7) @ St. Louis Rams
(Patriots win but fail to cover)
Indianapolis Colts @ Tennessee Titans (3.5)
(Titans win but fail to cover)
Oakland Raiders (1.5) @ Kansas City Chiefs
(Upset special, Raiders won outright)
New York Giants (1) @ Dallas Cowboys
(Giants cover)
New Orleans Saints @ Denver Broncos (6) is the Sunday night game.
(Upset special, Saints win outright)
San Francisco 49ers (6.5) @ Arizona Cardinals is the Monday night game.
(49ers win but fail to cover)
Brooklyn born, Long Island raised, and now living in Los Angeles, Eric Golub is a columnist, blogger, author, public speaker, satirist and comedian who is obsessed with the National Football League. There is no offseason. Every February he pretends to care about other sports while sobbing uncontrollably each Sunday until September.
Eric is the author of the book trilogy “Ideological Bigotry, “Ideological Violence,” and “Ideological Idiocy.” When not watching football, his only other hobby is Republican, Jewish women. Republican, Jewish women, you may contact Eric above.
Follow Eric on Twitter @TYGRRRREXPRESS Eric Golub is an independent writer for the Communities. Read more from Eric at his TYGRRRR EXPRESS blog. Read more: NFL 2012 Predictions | Washington Times Communities
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