CHICAGO, January 1, 2012- Every year people make New Years resolutions. They are promises to improve themselves and their financial, familial, or social situations. They are usually promises to be broken.
You know, lose weight, get married or find a significant other, get a better job, seek fulfillment, the meaning of life, and enlightenment, be a better parent, spouse, partner, or something. Workout more, get in shape, improve self esteem, and a host of other Goodie Two Shoe type things that make us normal people gag.
Gym memberships will be bought and go unused, marriages or partnerships will dissolve, your kids will still hate you, your clothes will fit no better, you will find out there is no self fulfillment or meaning to life, and no matter how you cut it, the same person will be staring at you from the mirror. So much for self esteem.
It is what it is. Reality bites. Welcome to the real world.
This year I am making decisions. Once you decide to do something you are on the road to action. It is not some wannabe pie in the sky with ice cream on top resolution. It is not some audacity of hopey changey thing.
Active people make decisions. Passive people make resolutions. Decisions are carried out while resolutions are thought out, or about, or something.
Decisions are made, implemented, and executed. They are, well, decisive. Resolutions are wishy-washy and namby-pamby.
Since this is 2012 I came up with a dozen decisions for the New year. A dirty dozen, if you will.
This year I will:
- Never get drunk again. Until the next time.
- Come home immediately from errands instead of three days later.
- Take one week to celebrate my birthday.
- Only do the things I want to do. After me everyone else will come first.
- Be more curmudgeonly.
- Be a sharper stick that pokes harder and is more annoying.
- Use sharper wit, satire, and humor to get points across. Okay, make fun of people and situations. No pity. No mercy. Life’s not fair why should I be.
- Seek out the opposite of Facebook. A place where you find enemies. Anyone can get friends. Important people have enemies.
- Look to a better future with a positive optimistic attitude. Hey, things are so bad now they can’t get any worse. Right?
- Most people see the glass as half empty or half full. I will be a realist and just see the cocktail.
- Search for the mythical honest man. When I find him I will capture and sequester him, get the interview, and sell it to the highest bidder. Hey, I have abetter chance of finding an honest man than you do with your resolutions.
- Hope for the best, expect the worst, and be content with anything in between.
Have a happy and prosperous New Year. I wish all of you the very best.
Remember, life is tough, it’s tougher if you’re stupid. (John Wayne as Sgt. Stryker/Sands of Iwo Jima.)
Peter V. Bella is a retired Chicago Police Officer, freelance writer, photographer, cook, and raconteur. He likes to be the sharp stick that pokes and annoys. His opinions are his and his alone.
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