Chick-fil-A still ruffling Proco Joe Moreno's feathers

Going after Chick-fil-A is one thing. Insulting a Catholic Cardinal in Chicago is just stupid. Photo: Chick-fil-A

CHICAGO August 3, 2012— Chicago aldermen are not known for their intelligence, intellectual abilities, critical thinking, or even horse sense, the sense horses have that keep them from betting on humans. 

1st Ward Alderman Proco Joe Moreno proved that by trying to argue, through the media of course, with Cardinal George of Chicago’s Catholic Archdiocese. Proco Joe definitively proved any simpleton could and does get elected to office in Chicago. 

Recent comments by those who administer our city seem to assume that the city government can decide for everyone what are the ‘values’ that must be held by citizens of Chicago,” Cardinal George wrote on the Archdiocese of Chicago’s blog Sunday.

“I was born and raised here, and my understanding of being a Chicagoan never included submitting my value system to the government for approval. Must those whose personal values do not conform to those of the government of the day move from the city?” 

To which Moreno responded: 

“It’s unfortunate that the cardinal, as often happens, picks parts of the Bible and not other parts,” said Chicago Alderman Proco Joe Moreno in response to Cardinal George/Chicago Tribune, who added that he was raised Catholic in western Illinois, attended a Catholic grade school and was an altar boy. Moreno said he now occasionally attends church. 

“The Bible says many things,” Moreno said. “For the cardinal to say that Jesus believes in this, and therefore we all must believe in this, I think is just ingenuous and irresponsible. The God I believe in is one about equal rights, and to not give equal rights to those that want to marry, is in my opinion un-Christian.” 

All you need is the “blessing of the boys”, an ancient sacrament of the Holy Democratic Crime Family better known as the Democratic Machine. A mind is not necessary in the mindless machine. 

It is evident Proco Joe never read the Bible, let alone paid attention in whatever parochial school he claims to have attended. It is apparent that Proco Joe picks and chooses what he believes in, except for the one true faith, the one religion, the one gospel - the Chicago Democratic Machine.

It is the theology of “money power”. 

So Proco Joe sold his soul to Beelzebub and converted to the Democratic Chicago Way, the only true religion in Chicago. Their bible preaches vileness, avarice, greed, corruption, and criminality. Those are and always have been the values of Chicago politicians. 

Money is power, power is money. That is the Chicago Way. The more money politicians amass they can run for reelection, they can also contribute to each help each other, and they amass more power. 

If Chick-fil-A wrote a big check people would be stunned how fast Proco Joe could shove tasty chicken sandwiches down his gullet.

For free, of course. Aldermen do not pay for stuff.  A hungry and broke alderman is considered a stupid alderman. 

Maybe Cardinal George is right in thinking Alderman Moreno is considering a Council Committee on Un-Chicagoan Activities. People and businesses that do not share amoral Chicago values will be investigated, forced to testify, forced to name others, suffer economic torture, and be blacklisted if they fail to do so. 

Of course if they slide a campaign donation the Alderman’s way they will be absolved. Money salves all sins. 

That’s the Chicago Way. You can be a victim of the Inquisition or you can purchase benediction. It does not matter what you say, think, or believe. It does matter how much you contribute. 

Chicago values are not American, Judeo-Christian, or moral values. They are truly unique, rare, and idiosyncratic. Sometimes they are idiotic like the politicians. 

Alderman Moreno also never learned one of the first rules of Chicago politics and bureaucracy. Never argue or insult the clergy, especially the powerful clergy, even if it is done obliquely.

Never, ever, ever, forever. You always look dumb and never win. 

There is nothing Alderman Moreno will not do in the name of dirty politics, even stooping so low as to insult a Cardinal. Let’s cut to the chase. Moreno wants what he wants, money and the right to pick and choose his family and friends to work at Chick-fil-A. He will get his way or there will be no Chick-fil-A. 

Moreno could care less about gays, straights, equality, or civil rights. He only cares about kachingos and taking care of family and friends. 

Proco Joe is amassing a campaign war chest and political army so he can go from being a freshman alderman to a sophomore. He will have the aldermanic right and privilege to spout sophomoric platitudes. From there he can pass to junior class alderman. That will give him the aldermanic right and privilege to act like a juvenile. 

Last, he will join the graduating class of senior aldermen. He will be granted the aldermanic right and privilege to fall asleep during city council meetings, spout senile silliness between snores, and retire from his part time job with a full pension and Rolls Royce health care benefits. 

The position of Chicago aldermen is legally a part time job. They receive an escalating six figure executive salary, premiere health care benefits, generous expense accounts, and a pension. They are allowed to own businesses, operate professional practices, such as law firms, insurance companies, real estate offices, or earn a full time living anyway they can.

Chicago aldermen also have unlimited power.   

What part time job in America is so lucrative?  Is it no wonder aspiring people of low breeding and minimum intelligence aspire to be a Chicago Alderman instead of President of the United States or any other worthwhile career of accomplishment or achievement? 

What’s astounding is the people of Chicago put up with this. They keep voting the dullards in. It proves the stupidity of the voter should never be underestimated. 

Maybe Proco Joe Moreno better leave town, keep his mouth shut, and let the storm blow over. He can claim exhaustion and go into hiding to rest ala Jesse Jackson Jr. A high paid part time job can run down even the hardiest greediest people.

When the fiasco he created fizzles out he can return, slinking back into City Hall, refreshed and ready to do something else stupid. 

If Proco Joe keeps saying dumb things, insulting the clergy, and showing how simple-minded all Chicago politicians really are he will suffer the punishment of the Democratic Machine. The boys will find someone else to bless and take his place.   

Proco will have to actually go out and get a real job at way less pay to earn his living. Maybe Chick-fil-A will hire him to work in one of their restaurants. They do not discriminate against anyone, including intellectually challenged politicians.

Anyone, even a Chicago alderman could learn how to make chicken sandwiches and waffle fries. The hard part will be training him to be nice.

Peter V. Bella is a retired Chicago Police Officer, freelance journalist and photojournalist, cook, and raconteur.  He likes to be the irreverent sharp stick that pokes, prods, and annoys.  His opinions are his and his alone. Mr. Bella is a member of the National Press Photographers Association and the Society for Professional Journalists. 

pvbella@gmail.com 

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Peter Bella

Peter Bella is a retired Chicago Police Officer, freelance photographer, freelance writer, budding videographer, and passionate cook.  He aims to be the sharp stick that pokes and annoys.  The Middle Class Guy is a political column written from a center-right point of view.  While concentrating mainly on politics he will stray into culture, entertainment, sports, cooking, and humor from time to time, along with Memories of things Pabst.  All from a middle class perspective.

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