LOS ANGELES, April 8, 2013—Last week’s episode of “Dallas” saw Cliff Barnes, Harris Ryland and the corrupt Governor of Texas all conspiring to bury the Ewings. This week the Ewings respond in a new, two hour blockbuster.
Backstory: The attempt to take the Ewing family down began with Cliff and Harris ordering a bomb placed on a ship being run on methane produced by Christopher Ewing. The explosion was meant to show that Christopher’s technology was faulty.
Drew Ramos was blackmailed into making the bomb and placing it on the ship. When Drew refused to leave town and continued dating Harris’s daughter Emma, Harris kidnapped him and beat him up. He was left alive, discovered by his sister Elena.
Cliff knew his daughter was on the ship and was pregnant with his twin grandchildren but ordered the detonation of the bomb anyway. The resulting injury caused Pamela to miscarry. John Ross comforted her and Christopher eventually did likewise. Yet neither informed her they’d figured out her own father was behind the bomb.
The Governor pressured a regulatory agency to blame Christopher’s technology rather than sabotage. The resulting one billion dollar fine put the Ewings in a bind. Harris had the Governor seize land the Ewings were drilling on via eminent domain.
Unfortunately for the unindicted co-conspirators, one member of the regulatory agency had a crush on Sue Ellen, and he blew the whistle on the sabotage of the ship, also pointing out that Harris was the Governor’s top financial contributor.
John Ross, Christopher, Sue Ellen, and Bobby vowed to fight together to save the family and its livelihood. Meanwhile, Mexican billionaire Carlos Del Sol (modeled, perhaps, onreal Mexican billionaire Carlos Slim?) introduced Bobby to a woman claiming she was with J.R. right before he died.
Some papers showed that J.R. was looking for Christopher’s mother, Pam. because Cliff and Pam’s mother left all three of her children equal shares in Barnes Global. If Pam dies, her shares go to Christopher. If the Ewings were to own one-third of Barnes Global, that would put a serious crimp in Cliff’s plans to destroy the Ewings.
Welcome to a two hour bonanza, Season 2, Episode 12 of Dallas.
Brooklyn born, Long Island raised, and now living in Los Angeles, Eric Golub is a politically conservative columnist, author, public speaker, satirist and comedian. Eric is the author of the book trilogy “Ideological Bigotry, “Ideological Violence,” and “Ideological Idiocy.”
Eric is 100% alcohol, tobacco, drug, and liberalism free. Follow Eric on Twitter @TYGRRRREXPRESS.
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