Is sexting cheating?

Anthony Weiner got caught in a sex scandal without having any sex. If one is married, is cybersex, phonesex or sexting cheating? Photo: A little sun, a little texting Wikimedia Commons

MANHATTAN, July 27, 2013 — Anthony Weiner has seen his mayoral campaign rocked by more disclosures from more women. A 23 year old progressive activist engaged in cybersex and phonesex with Weiner. The appropriately named Sydney Leathers sent him a picture of herself wearing a thong and in return received a picture of him below the waist “inflagrante delecto.”

Forget politics. This is about sex. Ever since Bill Clinton insisted that oral sex is not sex, and that he did not know what “is” is, men have tried to expand the areas of acceptable behavior. Women have responded with everything from humiliated acceptance to divorce lawyers to NRA training classes. 

Weiner’s wife Huma Abedin has stayed with her husband, but this situation penetrates much deeper than her. Two serious questions must be asked.

1) If Anthony Weiner was single, would this even be an issue? 

The answer is a resounding “No.”

Women have been attracted to powerful men since Eve took out the leafblower and blew away Adam’s floral covering. Adam had as powerful an aphrodisiac as it gets, the claim of being created by God. In modern society, the entire point of men accumulating power is so that women who would otherwise never talk to them will remove their clothing faster than Eve after an apple tasting contest.

Anthony Weiner is more than twice the age of Syndey Leathers. So what? 23 years old is legal. Every heterosexual man with a pulse would find receiving her thong pic to be good for his ego and more.

The second question is a much tougher one.

2) Did Weiner commit adultery?

Weiner may be the only man in political history to get caught in a sex scandal where nobody had any actual sex. He received all the pain with no pleasure, unless one finds self-satisfaction to be anywhere near as gratifying as being with an actual partner.

When one is married, is phone sex with somebody else cheating? What about cybersex? How about sexting?

When the internet was in its infancy in 1997, I received illicit requests. When the girl requested phonesex, I had only one question. Where exactly does the phone go? Fearing I may be revolted by the answer, my declining her tender offer was followed up by her request for cybersex. I inquired if she had Norton anti-virus and if she had sprayed her monitor with non-oxynol 9. I did not want to contract a nasty computer virus.

Over the years, women have voluntarily sent me naked pictures of themselves. When I questioned one of them whether this was appropriate, I was told to “shut up, be grateful, and say thank you.” One woman who sent such pics ended up becoming my girlfriend for almost a year. Apparently a woman’s naked body does capture my interest.

Yet just because women like sending such pics does not mean they like receiving them. Men should look in the mirror, ask themselves if anybody really wants to see that and conclude they do not.

Many people can rationalize that the internet is just fantasy, but that does not pass the sexual smell test. Weiner allegedly had planned to meet one of his internet paramours in real life at a hotel. He was most likely not hiring her for maid service, unless his alter ego was Dominique Strauss-Kahn instead of Carlos Danger.

The best answer regarding boundaries is to define the meaning of pornography. A Supreme Court Justice once said that porn was one of those undefined things that you just knew it was there when you saw it.

Anthony Weiner did not have physical sexual relations of any kind outside of his marriage. Yet he went out of his way to keep his behavior hidden. A reasonable person could conclude that he knew that his behavior was at the very least morally wrong, in addition to be quite “icky.” Even if he was within the letter of the law of marriage, he certainly violated the spirit of it. Jimmy Carter once confessed to lusting in his heart, but Weiner took it much further.

Would most people be ok with their partner engaging in phonesex, cybsersex, or sexting with others? Probably not. Therefore, it has to be concluded that such behavior does cross the unwritten line of what constitutes cheating.

I do not have such problems in my relationships. I date modern women who use technology in a different way. They have GPS tracking software in my trousers to know where both my pants and I have been.

READ MORE Date, Set, Match with Eric Golub

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Eric Golub

Eric Golub is a politically conservative Jewish blogger, author, public speaker, and comedian. His book trilogy is “Ideological Bigotry,” “Ideological Violence,” and  “Ideological Idiocy.” 

He is Brooklyn born, Long Island raised, and has lived in Los Angeles since 1990. He received his Bachelors degree from the University of Judaism, and his MBA from USC. A stockbrokerage professional since 1994, he began blogging on March 11th, 2007, the three year anniversary of the Madrid bombings and the midpoint of 9/11. He has been inflicting his world view on his unfortunate readers since then. He blogs about politics Monday through Friday, and about football and other human interest items on weekends.



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