WASHINGTON, October 12, 2011—The shorts have grown longer; the muscles bigger; the dunks higher.
But the NBA is losing fans. Fast.
This shouldn’t happen. The fast-paced game of basketball perfectly befits society’s horrendously small attention span. Points are scored every minute and assists (and lawsuits) are dished out more frequently than iPads at 720 Entertainment.
The NBA has both relatable stars – Kevin Durant, Dwight Howard – and greedy villains who shamelessly support the capitalist regime that is McDonald’s Monopoly in Lebron James. (Free fries, my butt – haven’t won a darn thing since 2004.)
Doesn’t matter. The NBA is high-top-deep into a lockout which could cripple the sport forever (see: baseball). Summer league and preseason have been canceled already, and the regular season – the beginning of it, at least – seems to be next on the chopping block. Stars like Deron Williams and Tony Parker have signed to play abroad, and rumors abound about Kobe Bryant’s love of the Italian countryside.
The NBA owners are mostly at fault. When Robert Sarver, owner of the Phoenix Suns, gives Josh Childress – yes, Josh Childress – a five year, $34 million deal for simply having an afro, he has no right to get all whiney. It’s unbecoming. Same to James Dolan and Donald Sterling. These men have less business sense than me, and I spend money on comic books.
We all know the NBA doesn’t have the same effect on us as the NFL, which endured a similar lockout this summer. If the NBA cuts games, it cuts fans, too. That means less revenue for everyone. But the posturing figureheads don’t seem to recognize the big picture; they’re only concern is defending their egregious signings. Michael Heisley, owener of the Memphis Grizzlies, admitted he’s never even read the CBA (collective bargaining agreement).
Every day these idiots keep blubbering, the NBA dies a little.
If he were dead, Jerry West would totally roll over in his grave.
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