SALT LAKE CITY, May 28, 2013 — Our favorite gouda-loving soccer player, Amanda Bynes, has been making headlines recently for some inexplicably erratic social media behavior. Twitter, it would seem, has become her new best friend and microphone.
Unfortunately, as wonderful as Twitter is, Bynes is ignoring a few rules of appropriate Twitter usage. In case you are ever to find yourself in the same predicament, here’s a Twitter crash course:
1. Too many selfies make you look crazy.
So you want to show everyone your new haircut with your best kissy face and your bathroom has the best lighting? Fine, go ahead and snap a photo, but remember, you’re allotted just two more of those before people start to think you’re off your rocker.
When Bynes started oversharing new hairdos and extreme piercings via Twitter and Instagram, that’s when the has-she-lost-her-mind rumors started flying.
2. Don’t fight with your friends. To be fair, Bynes denies attacking Rihanna on Twitter, tweeting that the derogatory tweets were “fake tweets” written by someone else. Still, it’s an important lesson to jot down and to repeat as often as needed. If you’re in a fight with someone, don’t engage with that person on Twitter. There is never a scenario where Twitter slams and “Yeah, well, you’re ugly!” style tweets are a good choice.
3. Make major career decisions offline. Remember back in 2010 when Bynes tweeted she was retiring from acting? Then yesterday remember when she tweeted that she was going to become a singer/rapper? These all sound great, but if Twitter is the first place you’re announcing something, you’re most likely announcing it prematurely. First tell your family, tell your friends. If you’re a big deal, then hold a press conference or tell a newspaper. But once you post it to the Twitterverse, it’s out there, and people will hold you to what you say.
4. “Romance” and Twitter don’t mix very well. You like a guy, you want to ask him out, great. Be sure to call him up and invite him to dinner/the movies/the park/your house etc. You should not, however, ask him out on Twitter, because then you could end up doing this, and that would be really embarrassing.
5. Avoid threatening legal action. Thursday, Bynes threw a bong out the window of her New York midtown apartment and was also accused of “rolling a joint” in the lobby. After being arrested by the NYPD for this behavior she has since threatened via Twitter to sue them.
It’s unlikely that this particular scenario will happen to you, but as you disagree with people in your life or feel unjustly dealt with and want to take legal action, then remove anything having to do with Twitter from your legal solution equation. Getting the law involved is a trump card of sorts. If you’re daily posting tweets about suing this person or that, you become the boy who cried wolf and soon nobody will take you seriously.
These five tips will help you to continue safely using Twitter. In the meantime, don’t lose any love for Amanda Bynes: She’s a wonderful actor (soon to be singer!) and we predict she’ll be able to turn this negative press around. To watch it all unfold follow her @AmandaBynes.
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